I normally don't stress too much and handle situations pretty well, but the weight of the day is just building way too quickly this morning and I am feeling almost nauseous. I started writing blogs to give people a sort of behind the scenes look at things, but today is a totally different beast. I am actually writing this post because I am under so much stress and need an outlet. I know I posted that my next blog entry would be the last until today's hearing and I apologize for that. Life just kicks you in the ass sometimes and I am having a very hard time this morning.
To say today's hearing means the world to me would definitely be an understatement. And I don't want people getting the wrong idea about this post thinking that I'm crumbling before the big show or anything like that. I just feel like the weight of the entire Socal scene is sitting on my shoulders and I want nothing more than to succeed for the community. I have dealt with many things in my life and maintained my composure through the most stressful situations. Funny thing is, I was able to do all this from my experience gained through competitive gaming. I started my career when at about the age of 15 and the first tournament I entered I faced none other than the person who I consider the best Street Fighter player off all time, Mr Tomo Ohira. I fondly remember playing him in the Grand Finals and winning the first set 4-3, then losing the final set 4-2. But these old man tales are for another day and I'll get back to the subject. Being able to perform to your full potential at all times is a very critical skill in life and very valuable.
Many people deal with the issue of not being able to perform under pressure, and I know there's some Viagra joke I'm missing there but this is a family friendly blog so I'll leave the puns to James Chen. Anyways, dealing with stress is very tough sometimes and can easily sway your thoughts or even lead to health problems. I envy the people that are the true leaders in their communities because they deal with stress everyday. Making decisions for yourself is sometimes tough enough, but when you are making decisions that can affect a large amount of people, this is where things get rough. I have supported the community known as the #FGC since its birth. I have loved games since before the days I could even reach the joystick panel. There is just something magic about video games that is unexplainable and leaves you yearning for more. But then again I guess the same could be said about crack to a drug addict so it would probably be tough to understand unless you are an avid gamer.
Regardless, I want everyone to honestly know that I am doing all that I can. I took on a huge responsibility by running a kickstarter and I am doing my best to keep my word. I hope everyone had a chance to see the last public hearing so you guys have a better idea of what I'm dealing with. Basically, the fate of the community lies in the hands of people that have a grudge against the property owner and taking it out on me. I am in a very tough spot but still fighting my heart out to make things work out. I truly hope tonight goes well, and the funny thing is, I have written about 5 speeches for tonight and will probably use none of them. There was a guy on r/kappa not too long ago that posted this vid after I was denied back on June 24th : (Rocky Balboa Scene)
I am a huge rocky fan so it was pretty fitting for the mood and in all honesty, I think I might just dump my current speech and go with the "feelings" approach tonight. Either way, I want to thank you all for being there through this and I am very touched by everyone's effort to help. I hope to see a bunch of you guys there tonight and let's make this happen.
Thank You Again For Everything,